I called and invited a friend to lunch the other day. He’s in his 80’s. I ordered a salad, dressing on the side.  He ordered a parfait. I smiled and he asked if he amused me.

I answered, "Yes, you do, but also you confuse me. How come you order rich desserts, while I feel I must be sensible?"

"Well, I try to eat the food I need, and do the things I should.  But life's short, and I hate missing out on something good.  This year I realized how old I was. So, before I die I've decided to try all the things that for years I had denied myself.

"I haven't smelled all the flowers yet either and there are too many trout streams I haven't fished. There's more fudge sundaes too, and kites to be flown.

 "I always loved golf and there are too many golf courses I haven't played. I've missed a lot of ball games and hotdogs, potato chips and cokes.

"I want to wade again in water and feel ocean spray on my face like I did when I was a kid. I want to sit in a country church once more and thank God for everything He’s given me.

"I want peanut butter every day on my morning toast. I want to see my grandkids again, and talk for hours on the phone with people I love.

"I want to walk in the morning rain, feel the wind on my face.

"So, if I choose to have dessert instead of dinner, and die before the next morning, I'd say I died a winner. I filled my heart's desire. I had that final chocolate mousse before my life expired."

 With that, I called the waitress over.. "I've changed my mind. I want what he is having, only add more whipped cream!"

Received this from a friend and thought it was appropriate for seniors trying to enjoy their retirement life....

A man stood before a group of seniors and had some items in front of him. When everyone was seated, he picked up a very large and empty mayonnaise jar and proceeded to fill it with golf balls. He then asked the group if the jar was full. They agreed that it was.

The man then picked up a box of pebbles and poured them into the jar. He shook the jar lightly. The pebbles rolled into the open areas between the golf balls. He then asked the seniors if the jar was full. They agreed it was.

Then he picked up a box of sand and poured it into the jar. Of course, the sand filled up everything else. He asked once more if the jar was full. The audience responded with a unanimous "yes."

The speaker then produced two cups of coffee from under the table and poured the entire contents into the jar, effectively filling the empty space between the sand. The audience laughed.

"Now," said the speaker as the laughter subsided, "I want you to recognize that this jar represents your retirement life. The golf balls are the important things – your family, your children, your health, your friends and your favorite passions – and if everything else was lost and only they remained, your life would still be full.

"The pebbles are the other things that matter, like your house and your car."

"The sand is everything else – the small stuff. Now, if you put the sand into the jar first, there is no room for the pebbles or the golf balls. The same goes for life. If you spend all your time and energy on the small stuff you will never have room for the things that are important to you.

"Pay attention to the things that are critical to your happiness. Play with your grand children. Get medical checkups. Take your spouse out to dinner. Play another 18 holes. There will always be time to clean the house and fix the disposal. Take care of the golf balls first – the things that really matter. Set your priorities. The rest of retirement life situations are just sand."

One senior raised her hand and asked what the coffee represented. The professor smiled. "I'm glad you asked.

 

"It just goes to show you that no matter how full your life may seem, there's always room for a couple of cups of coffee with a friend."

Meeting new people that share the same interests is more difficult after retirement. But don't get discouraged. There are ways to connect with others who share things in common. Whether it is golf, treasure hunting, dining out, going to movies, hiking, biking, kayaking, going to movies, book lovers, writers, or groups for grandparents raising grand children, gays, advocates for certain causes or more...they are out there.

Get on the internet and search for them. One website I found is 'Meetup'. This site has tons of different groups that get together for a variety of activities and interests. They can be found in most cities, or close to a larger city if you are in a rural community. Take advantage of it and make yourself available for activities, meetings etc. It's a great way to meet new people after retirement that have similar interests and goals.

You aren't restricted in joining only one group either. I joined 3.

If you don't find one that you are interested in joining, or you don't want to drive more than five miles to meetings start your own group.

My LAZY Gun  

Today I swung my front door wide open and placed my Remington 870 shotgun right in the doorway.  I gave it 6 shells; I even placed it in a wheelchair to help it get around.

I then left it alone and went about my business.  While I was gone, the mailman delivered my mail, the neighbor boy across the street mowed the yard, a girl walked her dog down the street, and quite a few cars stopped at the stop sign right in front of our house.

After about an hour, I checked on the gun. It was still sitting there in the wheelchair, right where I had left it. It hadn't rolled itself outside. It certainly hadn't killed anyone, even with the numerous opportunities it had been presented to do so. In fact, it hadn't even loaded itself.   You can imagine my surprise, with all the media hype about how dangerous guns are and how they kill people.  Either the media is wrong and it's the misuse of guns by people that kill people, or I'm in possession of the laziest gun in the world.

Well, I'm off to check on my spoons.  I hear they're making people fat!

Our yard is large, with fruit trees, a vegetable and flower garden, and other plants along with open space and black berry bushes. Translation; it is the perfect home for feral rabbits.

Let me set the stage.

While I love bunnies, my husband hates those cute little critters because he works hard planting, keeping the weeds out, trimming and fertilizing and the rabbits keep getting in and eat our plants and vegetables.

We have a rescue dog my husband bought me a year ago that had been abused by his previous owner.  

We love the little bugger, even though he came with a host of problems. We took him to doggie training when we first got him and after one session our trainer indicated that some dogs should just be put down. She said these dogs will never be able to have a good quality of life because they have too many mental problems.

I thought she was talking about some dog she had trained somewhere along the line only to make the connection days later that she was talking about our dog.

We take our little dog out to do his business every night before bedtime. Two evenings ago, while Dexter was roaming around looking for just the right spot, my husband took a tour of the yard as he always does, just to make sure the plants remember him from his morning tour. When he got to one of the blackberry bushes, a rabbit dashed out and across the yard.

Needless to say my husband was not happy seeing this as he works diligently to keep them out of our yard, and here they were again.

He began chasing the rabbit, The dog noticed his dad was chasing the rabbit and joined the hunt.

My husband, intent on ridding the yard of the rabbit, grabbed a stick and began poking the bushes while the dog waited, prancing back and forth excitedly. He soon learned to flush them out himself and the two of them would race together across the property in hot persuit of the rabbit.

So there they were, my husband bush whacking, with our little dog happily trying to find the bunny (who wasn't much smaller than our dog) and when he did the chase would begin again.

After a few attempts, I call off the hunt. I don't want the rabbit to get too tired, even though he is trespassing, or our little dog who is starting to pant. 

We all participate in the hunt. I am the scout, my husband is the bushwacker and the dog is the great backyard hunter. We all have great fun.  Except for the freeloading rabbit. I don't think he's liking it too much. But then, if you don't like what we have here, go next door right?

By the second night the bunny got a lot smarter. He is still in the yard eating free food and depositing his presents everywhere, but instead of taking off running when the bushes get whacked or he sees his nemisis Dexter, he sits quietly and waits hoping what he thinks is a very small coyote and that big two legged thing with a stick will just go away. He only runs if they get too close now... and the game is on again.